Amicable Divorces: 6 More Tips for Supporting Your Family Through Divorce

Amicable Divorces: 6 More Tips for Supporting Your Family Through Divorce

You do not think you are ever going to get a divorce when you get married. 

Unfortunately, the reality is that 40-50% of couples in the United States do get divorced! 

Many of these couples have children that can be negatively impacted by the process. 

How can you support your family through a divorce? 

Last month we wrote 10 Tips for Supporting Your Family Through Divorce.  It was so popular, we added 6 more!

The best answer is that no matter what the circumstances are, keep it amicable.

Follow Divorce Laws

Above all else, make sure you are following South Carolina divorce laws.  Believe us in this.. it will cause less stress.  Of course, following the laws means knowing the laws.  In this, you should seek to work with a partner (contact us) that will walk you through this challenging time step-by-step.

Try Not To Play the Blame Game In Front of Family

It does not matter who is at fault in the long run.  Blaming your soon to be ex-spouse is not the way to keep your divorce amicable, especially in front of your family.  You can imagine, going at your spouse for their wrongdoings could cause a lot of anxiety if you have children.  If you don’t, you may inadvertently cause your soon to be ex-spouse to dig in their heels and fight you every step of the divorce.

Focus on the long game here.   You’re only going to win in the end by getting separation from a bad situation.

Focus on the Big Picture

Before you go into mediation or start your divorce hearing, make a list of what is important to you – your needs, wants, and what is non-negotiable for you.  Also, think about how you want your parenting plan to be set up.  Remember to pick your battles and not fight over every little thing.  Doing so will cause tension and can draw out the divorce process a lot longer than if you choose what to fight over.

Negotiate Truthfully

When negotiating the terms of your divorce, do not hide assets or lie about your income.  Being completely truthful will help the process and keep tension from rising.  Another reason to be truthful is that in most cases one spouse has more knowledge of the household finances and bills.  This allows both people to know what is happening.  Being truthful helps the divorce to be transparent and can help each of you trust each other which will lead to an amicable divorce.

Put Children First

If you have children, they are the most important people in a divorce.  They need to know that both of their parents will still be there for them, that they love them, and that it is not their fault that this is happening.  You should also make an effort not to speak overly negatively of their other parent.  Do your children need to be brought into your challenges?

Using a mediator can help you when deciding what you both want for your children.  It is important to set up a parenting plan that you both feel comfortable with and that you can agree to co-parent your children even though you will no longer be married.

Divorce is Not War

Getting a divorce does not have to financially or emotionally drain you.  If you truthfully disclose information and documents, have mutual cooperation, and attempt a reasonable compromise, you can have an amicable divorce.

If you are in the process of getting a divorce or are thinking about filing for divorce, contact us today so we can help you!

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What’s the Difference Between Legal Separation & Divorce?

Legal Separation in South Carolina

You and your spouse have decided that you no longer can live together, but you are unsure about the way forward.

Legal separation?  Divorce?  You do not know what the difference is or how to do either.

In this article, we briefly talk about each of them and help you better understand the way forward.

Difference Between Legal Separation and Divorce

There are three main differences between a legal separation and a divorce.

  1. No waiting period: When you get a divorce, there is a waiting period before the court can grant a divorce. You do not have to wait a year to get a decree of legal separation.
  2. Ability to remarry: Unlike with divorce, when you are legally separated, you cannot remarry. You probably should not even date, in fact.  Being legally separated does not dissolve your marriage, and it is illegal to be married to more than one person in any state.
  3. Insurance: If you are legally separated, you can remain on each other’s employer-sponsored health insurance. Again being legally separated, you are still considered legally married.

More About Legal Separation in South Carolina

In South Carolina, there technically is no such thing as a “Legal Separation,” at least by that term.  Instead, the idea that best fits what most think about as a legal separation are Orders of Separate Maintenance and Support.  These orders cover specific issues of interest to both spouses including child custody concerns as well as shared assets and debts.

To establish Orders of Separate Maintenance and Support you should work with an attorney to help you frame and if necessary negotiate the different pieces, you will need to be covered within them.  Contentious issues can be ruled upon through mediation or trial.

When the orders become effective, you are still married.  This is important to recognize as you might complicate the whole separation and divorce if you choose to date someone else while you’re still married.  You should reach out to your attorney to discuss these risks.

About Divorce in South Carolina

When you file for and get a divorce, you are dissolving your marriage. In South Carolina, the process for your divorce, and in particular the legal requirements for divorce, are dependent upon several factors, including fault and contention.  If you need more information about how you should proceed with a divorce, please contact our team today!

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